Running makes me dumb.

And I am not talking about beforehand when I decide to go for a run.  Really, who casually decides that? Usually there are motivating factors to running such as a dress to fit into or T-Rex to escape.  Going for a run "for the hell of it" is kinda stupid.  Our ancestors worked very hard so that we can enjoy freedom from roaming carnivores. Seems idiotic to work backwards from that.

Nor am I referring to the stupidity that makes a person sign up for a marathon or a 5k that is only three days away.  Those usually involve persuasive friends or a  coupon for a "fun" sounding race (Zombie Run anyone? How about a color run where strangers pelt you with Kool-Aid packets?)

No, this is the specific dumbness that occurs when I am in the middle of running or just after when my oxygen/blood deprived brain cannot function at its optimal levels.

I call it Jock Syndrome.

Perhaps some examples can illustrate the point

I went on a run at lunch one day.  Needed to stretch the muscles and vent some frustrations.  After a good four-miler, I showered then went back to work.  And sat at my desk looking at a math problem for a good 10 minutes.  A simple math problem.  The same type that I had been doing all morning.  Worse, the idea of backtracking the problems I had already solved to figure out how to do the current one never even occurred to me.

A week later, I did another lunchtime run and found myself in my boss's office unable to form sentences in the right order. For half an hour, I sounded like Yoda if he ever decided to give up the force and go into advertising.

example:
"Boss, flowchart problem there is" I stumbled.
"what's wrong with the flowchart?" she asked
"Incorrectly linking formulas incorrectly"
"Why don't you go put your head down on your desk for a bit and we'll talk later?"

But the Jock Syndrome also happens to me while I'm in the middle of an activity.  This is probably my favorite and most telling example:

One night I was running my usual route.  It was warm and I was a sweaty hot mess, huffing-puffing my way down the street.  As I approached some trees, I thought "Oh good! Shade! that will cool me off!"  At night.  I was excited about shade at night.

So far, the effects have been temporary, usually back to my sharp, witty self within an hour or so.  But if you see me one day struggling with math or simple sentence construction, be kind.

Jock Syndrome might be permanent!